Get your own
 diary at DiaryLand.com! contact me older entries newest entry

Thursday, Mar. 25, 2004 - 1:22 p.m.

"when peace like a river attendeth my way, when sorrows like sea billows roll... whatever my lot, though has taught me to say: it is well, it is well with my soul..."

I have had to teach myself that what ever sercumstances may come my way that the Lord is in control and it (those "things") is well with my soul. The last few months of my life have not been easy to swallow... <> actually the last few years of my life have not been easy to swallow. I went from loving church and loving to serve to hating it all... except God. I could never bring myself to hate God. I love him... I could never hate him or blame him for things that dont go my way. For all that he has given me and all that he has done, I could not have asked for anything more-- ok, well, I could and sometimes did, but God knows my needs and knows my heart and he gives to me according to his will.

He gave me a church in my darkest hour of need-- litterally right before I was about to give up. I know it was the right church cause God new my needs and desires for a church and has met them all!

He has given me a job-- though I hate it at times (like everyone experiences)-- it is a job I know I cant live with out right now. And I am not talking about money.

These two things he has given me and I am thankful and no matter what tough situation that comes my way I see Gods hands on it and I know that he is with me all the way and I can tell myself "it is well with my soul". But the only thing that God has allowed to come into my life, that I am so confused about right now, has been the hardest for me to accept. I felt like he gave me the man of my prayers and my dreams! But the past month has made me doubt and made me confused. I want to know if I am hearing God right. I want to hold on to what I thought God told me but every situation around me right now SCREAMS the opposite.

Lord, your teaching me something and I am not sure what it is... so Lord, in this lesson please teach me to know that this too is well with my soul. "For I know the plan I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future!" Jer. 29:11. I want a faith like Moses.

 

previous - next

 

about me - read my profile! read other Diar
yLand diaries! recommend my diary to a friend! Get
 your own fun + free diary at DiaryLand.com!